So für alle, die vorhaben mich zu besuchen, gibt es jetzt eine kleine Englischstunde:

Dear Peter,
what think you are in moment the greatest problem here in Germany? That millions of people no job have? Here the rich Wessies and there poor Eassies? That the rents and pensions not safe are? I say you cliff and clear: All wrong! We know to time no bigger theme than the sonamed right-write-reform. Good. what we Germans so write, cries withunder to heaven: blau, but rauh; Auto fahren, but radfahren; Pappplakat, but Schiffahrt. There finds no pig through. And you as outlander, who German learns, must the hat high go. Without the Duden under the arm come you practish not more out. But we have yes sixteen culture-ministers, who day and night besorrowed are, that it us good goes and that the live not too hard is.
What shall we in future little write, what great? What must we together-write, what outanother? Must there a comma before and stand or not? How shall we a word part, when the line to end is? You see, questions over questions.
After a yearslong hickhack and many crazy discussion before and behind the stage have now the culture-ministers in their unendly goodness befound: Newerthings shall we Zu-cker write, but not Mu-tter. Meis-ter is now correct and also Isos-tasie. This understand, who will.
The reformers have still more crazy things in petto: ext-ra, but Ex-trakt. Fotografie shall o.k. be, but not Filosofie. The Rhabarber must the h behold, but not the Delphin, the Thunfisch oder the Känguruh. Out Stengel ist now Stängel, but out setzen not sätzen. But all our books must for this snick-snack new printed be. What a yearhundred-work be should, is complete into the trousers gone.
No wonder, that on ground of such a little-caro nonsense a proteststorm over the land swept. Pur poets and thinkers gave out deepest heart to protest: No, not with us! They have also our Federal President on their side, who mostest the nail on the head hits.
And the culture-ministers? They will absolute not from their high horse downcome. They say simple: Ätsch (speak: age), it is too late! The poets - please nice - could write, how they like. Overhead is the reform only for schools und public offices thought.
Only für schools and offices? I think, I hear not right! What can the poor children therefore, that the culture-ministers nothing better´s infalls? And what shall out all the others become, all the Otto Normal Consumers? Who thinks, that I the reform blindlings befollow will, was himself orderly in the finger cut. A devil will I do!
Your true Gisela